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“Decoding The Wild Woman: 5 Things She Wants”

What does the wild woman of today really want? How much could we benefit from decoding and understanding the wild woman in us all?

What is a “wild woman?”

In my mind, the term “wild woman” is associated with the concept of “Divine Feminine.” I think of the Divine Feminine as the wild creative (and destructive!) aspect of the Divine.

I think of storms and of full moon harvests and of purifying seasons of fallow. I think of swirling voids of potential, and of rivers and oceans and volcanoes erupting.

I think of pure creativity, a force which can be more powerful (read: disruptive) than you might expect.

Some women have devoted themselves to developing their own portion of this Divine Feminine, embodying it such that they in a sense become expressions of it. There were names for this in other times and cultures: Muse, courtesan, dakini, priestess. These are the inspirers, the wisdom keepers. The truth-sayers. You feel both nurtured and a little undone in their presence.  These are, to me, the wild women.

After spending a fair bit of time musing over these ideas, discussing them with friends, decoding my own wild ways, observing (my own perspective of) the collective consciousness, sharing experiences, etc. I have come to think that this Divine Feminine force exists as potential or expression in all of us, and is on the rise in humanity today. I also observe that it has certain ways about it, a certain profile if you will.

Just consider for a moment the ramifications, if this were truly the case!

What if this wild Divine Feminine force that has been mystifying us for centuries, doesn’t have to be so mysterious? How much could we benefit from decoding and understanding the wild woman in us all? And what does the wild woman of today really, really want? *

1- She wants you to engage her.  A wild woman has paid high prices to gather her gems of wisdom and knowledge. She has traversed meandering paths, deep valleys and steep climbs to gain them. It is her joy to offer them to you. These living gems can open your eyes to entirely new vistas within yourself that you may have stumbled for years attempting to reach. But you must actively receive the gifts. To engage a wild woman (for however long the dance between you) is to awaken a sacred contract—an agreement to grow beyond your comfort zone, to realize and comprehend your own mystery. You may think this contract is with her. It is not. It is with yourself. She will encourage and nourish your spirit as you navigate this. Take her up on it. It’s worth it.

2- She wants you to brave the whirlwind.  A wild woman knows you have gifts hidden within your own psyche that her Shakti can unearth. She may even see them plainly. But first, you’re going to have to brave a whirlwind. You must penetrate your own resistance to the destructive transformative power of her feminine essence. When she opens the door and draws near to you, when you soak in her energy, when you touch her body, confusion, projection and blame will rise up and stand between you. You’ll have to choose between an almost unexplainable magnetic attraction (which is your spirit pulling towards the potential for expansion and transformation), and the polarizing fear of that very transformation.

You will begin to rationalize as to why this will never work. You will be tempted to shrink back, to run. That whirlwind looks pretty formidable. But if you want real treasure, don’t run. Face into it and walk toward her.

She’s already braved the whirlwind and will wait on the other side of it. She’s seen this before, and she knows that the mere act of pressing through in spite of yourself will ignite (or extinguish) something in you. She lives for this, but ultimately it is your sacred choice and she knows it. She may hope, she may yearn, she may sit peacefully and wait or she may rage within herself as she calms the mirror image of your whirlwind in her own soul. But she will honor your choice.

3- She wants to respect you, because she needs to respect herself. A wild woman’s heart feeds her peace of mind feeds her spirit feeds her creativity feeds her work. She has learned that compromising her own self-respect topples the lot. That lot is important to her. If you don’t keep your word, if you lie to her, if you reject her wisdom, if you refuse to apologize, if you violate her trust, if you cannot humble yourself, if she sees that you are not serious about honor, that you consider these things trivial, she will lose respect for you. To continue dancing with a partner she does not respect will trouble her self-respect. She cannot afford this, and she will let you go.

4- She wants you to know that at times, she struggles to manage her own creative power. Remember the part about storms and erupting volcanoes? Divine Feminine power can be as explosive and destructive as it is creative. Sometimes a wild woman legitimately struggles to manage all the potential she is holding and the power of the energy coursing through her. Sometimes she will come off as severe or abrupt. She may speak truth plainly and she may seethe with irritation. Sometimes she recedes fiercely. It could be that she is surfing some high waves and has no spare energy to sweeten the medicine. Knowing this, we can extend some understanding and forbearance towards wild women and ourselves when we struggle to effectively manage the explosive power our creativity sometimes brings with it.

5- She wants to see you step into your fully actualized self.  A wild woman wants nothing more, nor less, than to see you through the process of your own becoming. She knows that you have a strong spirit and heart within you and she will call them forth if you allow it. You will experience new levels of feeling OK about yourself. Your creativity will increase. Your sensuality will go through the roof. You may fall in love. You will have breakthroughs. You will grow spiritually. You may experience dreams (or nightmares!) coming true. You will think she is working strange magic. She is not. She is simply acting as a conduit for the creative power that awakens the actualized self already in you.

* For a gender-neutral interpretation of this article, you can read through substituting “creativity” or “creative spirit” for “wild woman, her, she”